Joshua and Judges: Crossing the Jordan - Obeying God's delegated authority, part 8. Jos 1:16-18; Eph 6:1-4.

NOTE: DUE TO TECHNICAL DIFFICULTIES, THE VIDEO FOR TONIGHTS MESSAGE IS MISSING THE FIRST 10 MINUTES OF CLASS. WE APPOLOGIZE FOR ANY INCONVENIENCE. THE AUDIO FILE CAN BE HEARD IN IT'S ENTIRETY.

 

Title: Joshua and Judges: Crossing the Jordan - Obeying God's delegated authority, part 8. JOS 1:16-18; EPH 6:1-4.   

 

Announcements/opening prayer:

 

 

Delegated authority #3: Parents over the children.

 

In the family the parents have authority over the children. This is not for the children to decide or agree with and it is for the parents to exercise.

 

EPH 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

 

"obey" - u`pakou,w [hupakouo; present indicative] = to hear under authority, to hearken to a command, to be obedient, to submit to.

 

The present indicative shows that it is a continual command. While it is true that there are abusive parents, they are relatively few. Unfair does not mean abusive. The rule of life is not defined by the very few exceptions. The child is to obey and submit to the fair and unfair parents. All parents will be unfair at times since they are flawed, fallen beings like everyone else on this planet, but the child is not to determine when to obey and when not to. Outside the rare instances of child abuse, the child is to obey and he finds his strength to do so from the same source or sphere as his parents do, "in the Lord".

 

"in the Lord" - the children being with their parents in the Lord are to be influenced by spiritual duty as well as natural affection.

 

Two believing parents who love God's word raising their children in the ways of the Lord without compromise and with agape love as well as tough love, always keeping the interest of the child's proper growth above all other considerations, gives the greatest chance for a child to see that which is life indeed.

 

PRO 22:6

Train up a child in the way he should go,

Even when he is old he will not depart from it.

 

To obey their parents is the one command given that is directly pointed at them as children. Therefore it is vital that the parents enable them to do so as easy as possible. This means love and in love, speedy and affective discipline. A parent pleading with or arguing with their children, which in essence is expecting them to reason as an adult, makes obeying difficult, if not impossible.

 

Parenting is not debating, it is action in leading and instruction.

 

Adults learn how to reason, children cannot. To enter into debate with them over policy or boundaries is to put a pressure on them that they cannot bear. Without the time to learn truth and self-control the child will always choose for what he desires over what is right. Hence, God has delegated all authority over the child to parents. Hopefully the parents have learned truth and know the difference between good and evil, right and wrong, righteousness and unrighteousness.

 

It is also making clear why the boundaries set are set where they are and repeating and repeating this.

 

Think of how the Father is towards you and you have your perfect example. He loves, He sacrifices, He instructs, He leads by example, and He disciplines without delay in order to correct our erroneous courses.

 

If the type of discipline that is chosen by the parent is not feared by the child then it won't work.

 

Painless discipline is a waste of time. All children are different and will respond differently, but the rebellious will can and will be broken. Wisely, and in love, the parent breaks the rebellious will and not the spirit of the child. It is not overly harsh or unfair or random. Some children are as stubborn as a mule, but God deals with all of us in discipline, without which we could not produce any fruit (Heb 12) and parents must do the same for the prosperity and long life of their children.

 

It is also vitally important that discipline is consistent. When the boundaries that are set are crossed then there should be no doubt as to whether the discipline is coming or not.

 

Children need clear direction as well as clear and solid boundaries. They should learn clearly what is expected of them in the home as well as in public and what to expect when they obey and when they don't. They should learn clearly that obedience to other delegated authority is a reflection of their obedience to their parents. It's not easy on the parent to be so consistent, but raising children is not easy; just like marriage it takes endurance, perseverance, virtue, and love.

 

Discipline should always be administered privately. As with God, discipline is only a matter of parent and child, and it is no one else's business.

 

I'm a firm believer in privacy when it comes to discipline and also that without anger or great emotion, but in love, that it is vital to sit with the child and discuss the situation and instruct them after the discipline is completed. They should never feel ashamed of who they are, for all of us have needed it. They are normal for fallen creatures and they should be reminded of this. They should also be reminded of the infraction and why it commanded the discipline as well as being reminded of the value of discipline. They should also be reminded clearly that the parent loves them and that's why they are doing this. In this way the situation is not left with the spotlight on the error but on the solution and the love of God over His creatures, who will never abandon them.

 

Discipline should never be administered in anger, but in love, just as God does for us.

 

If a parent is angry they should take the time to calm their emotions before discipline is administered.

 

PRO 3:11 My son, do not reject the discipline of the Lord,

Or loathe His reproof,

 

PRO 3:12 For whom the Lord loves He reproves,

Even as a father, the son in whom he delights.

 

PRO 13:24 He who spares his rod hates his son,

But he who loves him disciplines him diligently.

 

PRO 19:18 Discipline your son while there is hope,

And do not desire his death.

 

PRO 23:13 Do not hold back discipline from the child,

Although you beat him with the rod, he will not die.

 

PRO 23:14 You shall beat him with the rod,

And deliver his soul from Sheol.

 

PRO 29:15 The rod and reproof give wisdom,

But a child who gets his own way brings shame to his mother.

 

PRO 29:16 When the wicked increase, transgression increases;

But the righteous will see their fall.

 

PRO 29:17 Correct your son, and he will give you comfort;

He will also delight your soul.

 

The example of the parents who discipline their children in love is used by the writer of Hebrews to highlight God's discipline of us.

 

If God doesn't do it then there will be not fruit of righteousness in our lives. If you truly love your children, you desire their own fruit in life, more than the difficulties that can come from performing consistent and fair discipline.

 

HEB 12:7 It is for discipline that you endure; God deals with you as with sons; for what son is there whom his father does not discipline?

 

HEB 12:8 But if you are without discipline, of which all have become partakers, then you are illegitimate children and not sons.

 

HEB 12:9 Furthermore, we had earthly fathers to discipline us, and we respected them; shall we not much rather be subject to the Father of spirits, and live?

 

HEB 12:10 For they disciplined us for a short time as seemed best to them, but He disciplines us for our good, that we may share His holiness.

 

HEB 12:11 All discipline for the moment seems not to be joyful, but sorrowful; yet to those who have been trained by it, afterwards it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness.

 

HEB 12:12 Therefore, strengthen the hands that are weak and the knees that are feeble,

 

HEB 12:13 and make straight paths for your feet, so that the limb which is lame may not be put out of joint, but rather be healed.

 

[back to]

EPH 6:1 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right.

 

EPH 6:2 Honor your father and mother (which is the first commandment with a promise),

 

"Honor" - tima,w [timao] = to estimate, fix the value. To honor someone therefore, is to evaluate that person accurately and honestly, and treat him with the deference, respect, reverence, kindness, courtesy, and obedience which his station in life or his character demands.

 

We have just seen the cognate verb to this noun in:

1PE 3:7b grant her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

 

So much of Christianity is how we treat one another. Treat one another with honor.

 

PRO 3:35

The wise will inherit honor,

But fools display dishonor.

 

PRO 8:18

"Riches and honor are with me [wisdom],

Enduring wealth and righteousness.